Super Human Strength: I've got it!

My hopes were nearly dashed this weekend by a foe I had yet to meet. He crept up when I least expected any adversity to be standing in my way, and he was not one of the usual suspects. I am quite used to "a spill on the shirt as you are walking out the door" and "overdue fines at the library". We have met each other often. My new little friend, however, waltzed into my life when I was leaving to go to a fondue lunch at our friends' home....and this annoyance absolutely made my day in the end.
I was so excited because I had never used my happy little fondue set that I have owned for...well, to not make me sound like the horrible procrastinator that I am, let's just say a while. So while preparing for her maiden voyage I had me some excitement threatening to spill out my nostrils. I really was happy for the opportunity to dip the bread in the cheese using my very own fondue set. So I pulled all the pieces out and oh the horror....two of my matching fondue-holder-cup-things (using their official scientific name) were stuck together.
Now when I say stuck together, I am using too mild of a term for what they were doing. They were locked in a passionate embrace as if one had been at war for the past 3 years. They, for all intensive purposes, had almost, somehow become physically fused together. Of course me being the independent, prideful woman that I am, I wanted to take care of this on my own accord. I put on my sassy-pants and pulled....then tugged...then jerked....then while breaking a sweat, pulled again. I have never been strong physically. My hands, as Jason knows well, are puny when it comes to opening jars and the likes but in this case I was giving it everything down to my toes!
Taylor, after enjoying the show for 5 minutes thus far, suggests we use soap because as she learned in 6th grade science this year, "soap makes water wetter". Light bulb! Science is indeed helpful in everyday life yet again. Grabbing my trusty antibacterial liquid goo, I slather and slide my fingers all over the bowls and wiggle and tap and turn....and NOTHING! FOR THE LOVE! I really do like this fondue set and it is so fabulous with 6 matching bowls of festiveness and I would like to emerge out of this match with all 6 still intact!!!
My lightening fast brain soon meanders to the idea that if we could wedge something sharp and unsafe in between the 2 bowls we might have a fighting chance to break this seal of eternity that has taken a hold of my day. Insert sharp instrument....literally.
No go.
Nothin' doing.
Why?! Why!!!
Is this punishment for my tendency to procrastinate? Is there a life lesson that I am supposed to get out of this now 10 minutes of science vs. man hands?
Oooooo, the voice of Jason that always is residing in my head speaks up. "Run it under hot water". That is his usual response if he is unavailable and I lack the strength to open the pickles. So, under the spout it goes and stays. Ouch, hot! But, I don't give up! I want to conquer this! I am stubborn! I am woman, hear me grunt and sputter and observe as I get angry at an inanimate object.
Sigh.
This is not working.....
I bang it on a towel on the counter hoping that it won't break because it is my beautiful, brand ing new, wonderful pile of fondue utensils. But the banging is unprofitable and I give up....in my own strength that is.
What comes next, is the icing on my really ugly, pretend cake that had made a mess of my previous 15 minutes!
I pray.
But not a "normal" prayer. Not a holier-than-thou, belongs in St. Paul's Cathedral, prayer. Oh no!! I was being "real"! A comical, half-joking but in my heart of heart's quite sincere, last result prayer.
I glance at Taylor with a smile on my lips and a sigh escaping in between.
"Father God, you KNOW that this is a heart's desire of mine. (To not break my pretty little party set.) So please give me....Super Human Strength. In the name of Jesus."
Not kidding in the least. Those were my exact words and I didn't even make it through the prayer. I lost it as I was saying "strength". I mean, do you blame me?! I just asked God for Super Human Strength for the sake of Pete! So I guffawed at the end of my sentence to God. Is that o.k.?! Darn-tootin' it's o.k.!
And Taylor and I giggled again, and then I pulled...AGAIN....
and I am as serious as a tax audit when I say that the very next pull
they came apart....
They came apart!!!
Taylor and myself laughed and flipped out as if we had won an elephant for a day! We giggled until our tummies ached from all the joy and I thanked God while giggling.
The point of the story is God loves so awesomely with a sprinkling of creativity that is never ending.....and I think He likes fondue just as much as I do.

I long for my sisters.
The aching is strengthening with each passing day. My Cherbear and Amista: a better pair cannot be found.... My plans for our European get away, just need a few more thousand dollars into the "Going-to-Europe with my siblings jar"! I can smell the tantalizing delicacies and lower standard of personal hygiene from here. To know that you both have dealt with my bossiness, constant sarcasm for the years of 1993-1996, and have smelled more of my farts than you ever needed too....AND you still choose to stay connected with me?....super hero's you both are!

Mistry- I hope to one day choreograph another Paula Abdul song with you....big sweaters and stretch pants and all!
Shirl- Have we ever discovered what else can make us laugh until we pee our pants except for "blue eyelashes"??!!
I love both of you more than underwear that succeed at being both comfortable AND suggestive!!! xoxoxoxo ~Tamikins~

Here are my peeps from the kindergarten field trip day. I am fully capable to execute the very same immaturity level with convincing accuracy. Here's to you Bryson, Jonathan and Zachary.

Coffee creamer

It's the little things in life that make it worth living.
Coffee creamer, in the spectrum of the universe, is not what most (or any) persons would consider to be important by any stretch of the imagination. It's one of the items in your cart that is a non issue. Either you have creamer....or you don't. No one will be rushed to the emergency room nor will massive amounts of counseling be needed to reverse the effects of missing creamer.
But, oh....it sure made my morning this morning.....
My heart actually jumped. Briefly and almost unnoticeably, but it jumped at the thought of creamer!
Ha! Laugh if you will. Consider me a silly "girl" who is just too emotionally charged for her own good. Too optimistic for this considerably pessimistic world that we reside in perhaps? In spite of the absurdity and insignificance of it all creamer made me happy this morning! It really, truly blessed my heart almost immediately because it was there!
Chocolate Toffee...that is the flavor. It is good. REALLY good! And I had absolutely forgotten that I had thrown it into my cart the other day. It was a side thought really....it hadn't even been on my shopping list....just saw it and thought, "Oooooo that flavor might be quite tasty!" Grabbed it. Dropped it into the cart and BAM!!! All the makings for my "Great Tuesday Morning" were within my grasp! Just by grabbing the tasty creamer....
Who would've thought.
Who would've thought that God could use creamer? I suppose I did, deep down in my soul. He IS God, you know.
And I love Him.....
I passionately love how he can use something like creamer, for example, to remind us that happiness must come from within. It isn't the fact that I had this chocolate toffee creamer that made me happy. Goodness no! It was the gentle reminder that the little things in life are what make life so enjoyable....not always the yacht and the condo on the beach. The most important things in life are usually free. (Or in my case, $2.) Happiness is at each of our fingertips. Perched on the end waiting for us to notice, to stop stressing, to breathe in deep the blessings that are EVERYWHERE if we but look.
Thank you God for creamer.
Thank you that I have the money to buy creamer. Thank you for my pink polka-dotted coffee cup that cost $0.25 at a garage sale. Thank you that my taste buds do exactly what you created them to do. Thank you that I have a computer to drink my coffee in front of. Thank you that I have fingers to type and share my thoughts with the people that are most important to me. Thank you for all the people who are most important to me; The people who have given my heart a place to rest on more than one occasion.
Thank you for this morning and my own personal hug that I got from you, in the form of
chocolate
toffee
creamer.

Taylor's trip into the dramatic arts

Oh my dear, dear Taylor. The sweat. The tears. The daily requests, "Mom why can't I quit?!! I loathe this play! It's soooooo boring!" But, you stuck it out. You persevered. You followed through with your commitment and alas..... You LOVED the applause! Drama is a new found addiction. Broadway, she'll be of age soon enough!

In response to "Beautiful".

So my sis thought I was being too down on myself in that last post. But in reality, I wasn't depressed or self-dissing at all. I just was stating random, deep thoughts that I had had in a waiting room the other day. I actually wrote most of that last blog on scratch paper while looking out the window in an office. My thought process began to go in that direction because I was thinking how the office was so blah and bland but just outside the window was...beauty! I apologize if it sounds like I have an incredibly low self-esteem right now.....it's not that. It's just contemplation put down in type.

Beautiful???

Who defines beauty? I demand answers! What is the definition of beauty?! In what culture should I move to where 'I' would be the definition of "beautiful"???
If a definition could or should be settled upon, whose to say some hyper, self-proclaimed intelligent won't scuttle up and stomp that particular definition into an oblivion?!
Where can beauty be found? I myself am ever searching. Ever longing.
All who you'd ask, would agree that it's location is ever changing moment by moment, breath by breath, touch by touch. We, as a race, are continually searching for beauty. Striving to attain beauty. Oh to arrive but only for a moment....but the moment is always fleeting.
For a woman, beauty is an unforgiving master; a slave driver that rides you, always in back of your thoughts. Pushing. Nudging. "Do more! You're so close. Just a bit farther. THEN you will be beautiful. More beautiful than....."
Go ahead! Fill in the ..... with whomever you choose. Women are notorious for being able to glance around a room and unconsciously see who might be more/less attractive than they are. Why do we do that? A waste of time, it is. For the open-and-shut truth is, there is NO arriving at "beautiful". There will always be a falling short, an 'almost made it', a 'you're so close but look at her'. There will always be someone prettier, more intelligent, more chiseled abs, smaller feet, bigger melons, longer hair, shorter hair, wittier, better in the kitchen, better in the bedroom! OH MY GOSH! Seriously?! When does it end?
How about this? I, for example, am not beautiful by this world's standards by any means. To be blunt, for starters, I just don't have enough chest to fill that position. When asked in a pole, "Name a beautiful woman.", I guarantee that 99.99% of people would NOT say my name. I'm not down on myself, just realistic.
So why am I not beautiful enough? Why, in a line up of suitable women, would most men pass me over? Oh! May I present the list to answer that?:
I'm chubby, gray haired, wrinkled, dry skinned, dry scalped, dry knee-ed (is that even a word?), stretch marked, thin haired, bad breathed, ogre-like resemblance in the morning, etc., etc, etc.
There it is!
The cold-hard facts.
A nice sterile list.
Impersonal, but true.
Insulting, but true.
Cruel and unfeeling, but true.
Not in any way does this list define 'beautiful'.
Nor does it 'define me'.
These physical flaws do...not...define me.
They also don't disqualify me for the 'beautiful' award!
However, some may disagree and I pity them.
I truly pity them simply because they are still in need of a bit of growing-up, another handful of life experiences to be thrown ever-so-abruptly into their faces. Life is notoriously efficient at changing your definition of 'beautiful' at every turn! This world's definition of beauty? It is fleeting. Temporary. Ephemeral.
Case in point. Is a woman no longer beautiful after her stomach has been stretched during her pregnancy? Has her beauty, or dare I say her exciting appeal, been left behind once she loses a leg suddenly? Gray hairs and saggy wrinkles, for sure, disqualify her for a pin-up photo shoot? But....is she....can she....still be beautiful, desired, enticing, magnetic, alluring, magnifique?
Beauty is temporary.
It is ever changing. Can be found in every moment in which you turn your neck and choose to notice the divine.
Beauty is in a young couple's wedding night. Beauty is in a book on a coffee table. Beauty is a flower petal on a lake. Dirty little finger prints on the wall. A baby's first smile. A wheel chair on a basketball court. In a Children's Hospital Cancer Ward's play room. An 83 year-old woman kneeling over the grave of her husband of 60 and 3/4 years. A kind word spoken to a wounded heart.
Beautiful is undefinable. Beautiful is never constant.
Beautiful is there, if you but look for it.